Today I helped out the neighbours by walking their vacuum cleaner Puppy, while one was at work and the other skiing in Italy.
Somehow during dinner the conversation turned to this and Tweedle Dee got a bit confused. For this blog I’ll name the neighbours Jack and Johnny. Yes, our neighbours are gay.
Without further ado here is an outline of the conversation as I remember it.
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Tweedle Dee; “Mom, is Jack a man or a woman?”
I; “Jack is a Man. Why?”
Tweedle Dee; “And Johnny?”
I; “So is Johnny.”
Tweedle Dee; “So Jack is a man and Johnny is a man?”
I; “Yes sweetie.”
*Insert a confused look in her eyes*
Tweedle Dee; “But that’s not possible. How can they both be a man?”
I; “Well because sometimes two men or two women love each other.”
Tweedle Dee; “No they can’t. One of them is a woman in secret. Right mom?”
*Insert huge questioning eyes staring at me*
I; “No dear, if people love each other it doesn’t always matter if they are a man or a woman.”
Tweedle Dee; “But you and dad love each other? Right?”
I; “Yes.”
Tweedle Dee; “And you are a woman and dad is a man?”
*Insert mischievous grin on her face*
I; “Yeeeeeees…” (Getting kind of nervous about what is to come, knowing my four year old daughter.)
Tweedle Dee; “And I am a girl and Tweedle Dum is a boy.”
I; “Yeeeeeeeeeees…” (Still a bit…worried…)
Tweedle Dee takes another bite and chews her food, a pensive look on her face, swallows and looks The Man straight in the eye.
“Dad, are you sure you are a man? Because if our neighbours are two men, you and mom should be two women and then everything would be fine.”
The look on The Man’s face? PRICE-LESS!!!
*So Written